Sunday, February 13, 2011

Snafu

I love that Army phrase. "Situation normal: all *$&@ up." That's pretty much life here at the VE household. While on a day to day basis everything is just fine, our kind of "fine" is much different than most people's. We've been tracking Roman's probable bipolar on a calendar and have found a definite peak & valley cycle. Now that we expect things on certain days, I think overall his larger rages are happening less and less frequently. So our weeks generally look like this:
Sunday: Emotional meltdown or rage. The buildup of fun/less structure. He will end up needing to be helped to calm down.
Monday: Very emotional, typically anger; occasionally needs help; still coming down from weekend.
Tuesday: Good day.
Wednesday: Emotional, cries easily. This is his "low" day.
Thursday: Good day.
Friday: Good day. Beginning to ramp up for "high" weekend.
Saturday: Will have a short and quick "high" in the a.m. which we can calm down. Continues to wind up (see Sunday).

Of course, if we go somewhere on the weekends or there is a major shift in plans during the week, this all changes. Ro holds it together really well when visiting grandparents or playing with friends - which makes his Sunday or Monday night meltdowns even bigger. But like I said, now that we can see the pattern (we've been documenting a little over a month now) we expect it and are ready for it - and we keep calmer too. Mostly.

Charlie either continues to be oblivious to his brother or accepts the snafu ambience in our home. He will play by himself when Roman needs our attention. He himself is a calming influence and when in the mood to play with Roman, can often be helpful. Of course, he's also 3 and getting into the "yank the toy away and if you don't give me what I want, I'll scream & hit you" phase. But because he's also in the "I want to help you and generally be a pleaser" phase, he will inform me when I need to put him in a time-out. He actually walked me through one yesterday. Told me to put him in time-out, then after it ended he said, "why was I in time out?" but it wasn't a question - it was like he was coaching me in what to say. It was pretty humorous.

So, when you ask how things are going, I'll say everything's fine. Nothing new to report, "the usual." But inside I'm thinking, "snafu!"

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