Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Busy physically & emotionally

This is always a crazy time of year. Doug's birthday, my birthday 4 days later, our anniversary (10 years this year!) a week after that. Throw in a scrapbooking convention that I attend every year, Mother's Day, and various other family birthdays, and it's a wonder I can keep anything straight!

This is also the time of year when Doug's golf league starts every Monday, baseball starts up for Roman in another week or two, and generally Charlie wants to be outside in the sandbox every. single. day. Throw in some weekly therapy to keep us all sane, a moms' support group every other week, and again - it's a wonder I can keep anything straight!

The boys are fabulous, except when they're... not. Charlie is really showing signs of having inherited my temper, and being 2 doesn't make it any easier. Tomorrow night we have an appt. with the Early On specialist to do his regular 6 month followup for his speech delay. We definitely are noticing improvement and some progress but how much, we're not sure. It'll be nice to double-check our goals with her. Charlie is also obsessed (when not talking about the sandbox) with Skype. We skyped with my brother the other night & the cousins got to talk - now he mentions my nephew's name every day. It goes like this: "Talk Baba? Eli? ELI! Talk? Skype?" Honestly, he does say something a lot like "skype."

Roman got his 3rd quarter report card and it was awesome. He is doing well in all areas, just a couple spots we need to work on (handwriting, reading strategies). His behavior report was completely opposite of what we've gotten used to - clearly the meds are working. We do therapy once a week and I believe he's making good progress there, too. He is able to look at pictures of us in Russia without getting dysregulated, has mentioned he'd like to learn the language, & generally is working on expressing his feelings to us without shame. Tonight was a hard one, he had a meltdown (we're not sure why) which, an hour later, brought us all to tears. It was tough going & emotionally draining, but Doug and I really experienced some feelings we had not fully acknowledged before about what we missed when Roman was in Russia. Good stuff.

Tomorrow is my birthday, which of course is terrific (today accompanied by my own adoption thoughts). I'm not bothered by my age, although when I look in the mirror it explains a lot of those weird skin & weight changes I've been having! It won't be thrilling - work & the Early On appt. kind of takes care of that - but Doug mentioned having to wrap presents (note the plural!) so I'm looking forward to that.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

What's new?

So many cute, funny things occur that I think, "I should blog about that!" but then the moment is gone when I finally sit down to the computer at night. And much of it is funny in the moment. For example, Roman made a prayer box at Sunday School this morning. I asked him, "so do we write down a prayer & put it in the box?" "THANK you!" he says emphatically from the backseat. Apparently I was the only one who "got it." It's just funny to hear him speak like a grownup.

And Charlie - my gosh, is he in caveman-speak now. Simple 2-word sentences mostly, although "up with Mama" or "up with Daddy" is what we hear the most. Where did something go "Ro-Ro go? Car go? Daddy go? Nemo go?" ad nauseum. And speaking of Ro-Ro, he said Charlie is the only one who is allowed to call him that anymore. Sheesh. Charlie also gets his feelings hurt by his Daddy often - like when he plays with the dirty dishes while trying to load the dishwasher, Doug got frustrated and said "Charlie, just go away!" Charlie came crying to me repeating "Daddy go away!"

The new "it" thing in first grade are Squishies, little rubber animals that go on the top of a pencil. Ro and I made a trek to the mall today and I agreed to let him buy a couple (25 cents each!). All 3 dispensers were empty. They are a hot commodity - apparently the kids trade them. Roman has a lion, parrot, & hippo that he's very proud of.

I finish swim season this Wednesday and am pleased to do so. Late practice is hard, as on a good day I get home around 6:30pm. Doug's birthday is next weekend, and mine a few days after, so there's excitement all around. I have finally purchased a couple new pair of pants & freshened my solid color t-shirt collection for the spring/summer... all I need now is a new pair of sandals. Everything else as normal as ever around here. :)

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Russian adoption in the news, again

If you haven't heard about the 7-year-old whose adoptive mother sent him back to Russia, you should check it out. It's horrible. My heart aches for the boy - and the mother. Granted, she's an idiot for just sending him back - legally he's her child for goodness sakes! But information I saw in the first story (which I haven't seen repeated) is an interview with a psychologist stating that adoptive parents are not prepared for the psychological wounds that many adoptees have. We truly cannot appreciate the backgrounds many of these kids come from, or the neglect or abuse they have suffered.

I can only imagine what life must've been like in that home. A woman at her wit's end, a child so needy & damaged. What had this child seen & experienced? Clearly the woman was not prepared for it. Of course, she should have been prepared for anything & everything. However, I must admit even Roman's behaviors have made me think more than once "What the hell have we gotten ourselves into? Why did we adopt?"

I read a post on a blog the other day (sorry, don't have the link) where the adoptive mom was explaining how she felt all international adoptees have "special needs" - some are physical, but almost all have special needs emotionally. If only all adoptive parents acknowledged that! It makes me sad wondering how many other families are struggling in this kind of situation and don't have the information or help available, and are on the edge of just plain giving up.

Sunday, April 04, 2010

Happy Easter!

Roman was up first around 7am and found the note from the Easter Bunny, detailing which eggs were his and which were Charlie's. After a hunt which included shoes & the chandelier, Roman settled in to build his Lego tank the Bunny brought.

Soon after, Charlie awoke & Roman was thrilled to assist him in finding his eggs. Charlie liked the hunt too, but was so excited about the ocean toys that the Bunny brought that he gave up after a few eggs, so Roman finished the hunt for him.


video

Charlie likes dumping the jellybeans out of the plastic eggs and feeding them to the rest of us. His report on them is "yucky." Roman has done a good job of controlling his candy intake. We're preparing for church now, with ham, au gratin potatoes, & cake as our noonday "dinner." I think Doug will take Ro out later to see "How To Train Your Dragon" and otherwise it will be a stick at home day!

Saturday, April 03, 2010

While on a walk

Charlie, pointing at bird: "Chicken!"
me: "That's a robin. That bird is a robin."
Charlie: "Robin."
me: "Yes, a robin."
...5 seconds later...
me: "What kind of bird is that, Charlie?"
Charlie: "Peacock!"