Thursday, May 29, 2008

Sleep... please...

I'm not complaining. Well, maybe a little. Charlie is generally healthy, we had no colic to deal with, and he's a happy quiet baby. Except note what time I'm blogging. Those few nights of 5-6, even 7 hours of sleep - gone. And I'm exhausted. And I'm crying. And I would give absolutely anything to sleep more than 3 hours at a stretch. I sat and cried the whole time I fed him this time. I have great pity parties for myself. When I want to feel real bad, I think about the fact that except for those handful of nights when Charlie slept through, I have been getting up at least once a night since November. And from all things I've read, he won't consistently sleep through until he's 3-4 months adjusted. That's around July, ya'll. And there are a whole lotta nights until then.

I don't know what's gotten into him, but since camping Charlie has reverted back to only taking about 4 oz. at a feeding. Growth spurt over? So is my sleep. He wakes consistently 3.5 hours in the evening. I am so, so tired of seeing 2am. 2:30am. 3am. 3:30am. 4:00am. And no, I can't nap when he does during the day. I have an almost-5 year old who can handle about 1.5 hours of rest in the afternoon before starting to bother me. And most days, having to follow Charlie's schedule, Roman's rest is not at a time when Charlie is sleeping. So no, well-meaning advice-givers, I can't just "nap when they do." Go to bed early? Sure, I'll go to bed at 9pm. And spend absolutely no time connecting with my husband. Ever.

I know I'm just tired. But I have no patience to deal with the kids, I have no energy, and I just want to (insert swear word here) sleep. More than 3 hours at a time. Please.

1 comment:

Cat Hoemke said...

Any of the days where I'm not writing "wow he slept through the night" are nights where I was up at least once, usually twice. I dread the nights when he's up every hour after 2am. Gah. Hang in there. Personally I think *this* is the hardest work a woman will ever do, _not_ labor.