Tuesday, January 29, 2008

very tired, very emotional

I am tired. I've been trying to get up to pump at night, but last night I didn't even make it. My eyes opened, and apparently I just went right to sleep. I paid for it in the morning, however, with some pretty sore... anyway, I did catch a 45-minute nap this afternoon and it helped me power through the evening. I'm exhausted, though. All that's happened in the past week is really starting to take its toll.

Being tired also makes me more emotional, if that's possible. I have held it together pretty well the past few days, just a few tears here and there. Well, until tonight. I'm just overwhelmed with "perceived" things to do, phone calls I think I have to return the same day, thank-you notes to write, and oh yeah, Charlie to see, Roman to raise, and a husband to have a conversation with once in awhile. And visiting Charlie is wonderful, but it's also very taxing on my emotions. I try to get some things done at the hospital but between pumping and holding him and grabbing some time for myself to eat or take a break, it's hard to carve out time to do anything else.

So today that's it. I'm just tired and emotional and going to bed. Family update:
Doug: Hanging in there. Getting frustrated with Roman's behavior (see below).
Roman: Barely hanging in there. Very whiney and cries hysterically at the drop of a hat. Very tired. Is beginning a behavioral chart at his preschool tomorrow.
Amy: See above.
Charlie: Doing well. Is taking 20cc per feeding today. We're reaching the point where they had to cut him off food last week, so the next couple days will be interesting. He's pooping and peeing well. He has gained a smidge of a few ounces, and has just passed his birthweight and weighs 1608 grams. Yeah, nice hospital measurements, huh? He was exactly 1600 at birth.
Rebekka: Saw Rebekka today. She's doing okay. I still can't blog about that situation without crying, so you'll have to wait a few more days for that update.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dear Amy, Just a little note to remind you of what you already know, that taking care of yourself is the best thing for ALL of your family. We all know that we're oh so much better when rested, so prioritize life, with those notes and 3 course meals way down the list. Everything going on is so very normal, from Roman's out of sorts behavior to Amy's sorting out the whole bonding thing w/both your boys. HANG IN THERE KIDDO! Another 3 weeks will make such a big difference! :) linda