This afternoon I got to spend some time with Roman. We played some Star Wars Legos, had dinner while watching a video (a treat for him), and then I gave the bath and let it be a really long one with toys and fizzies (these really cool drops you put in the water and they change color - tonight was purple). Anyway, he was really beginning to push, trying to "make deals" as we call it for bedtime, and all and all be a real brat. He was clearly tired. He got in my lap to hug and kiss goodnight and I asked if we could spend a minute or so talking. He immediately began to rock back and forth in my lap, so I told him to lean against me and we'd chat. He did, and we rocked.
We talked a little about Charlie, and spending time together, and then I will never forget this next statement. Roman said, "You cannot spend any time with me." What?! I said. "You have to keep Charlie's company now," was his answer. I started crying, because I figured that's what his little 4-year-old mind had done. He had made a statement a few weeks ago that Daddy was in charge of Roman, and I would be in charge of Charlie. I think he truly believed that, and now that Charlie was here, he and I couldn't spend time together anymore.
Roman voiced other concerns, like sharing ("I have to share you and Daddy, but you won't share me, right?"). Luckily, in that 4-year-old world of his, I only had to make a simple statement. "I plan on keeping Charlie's company during the day, and coming home and being with you around dinnertime and bedtime." "Oh!" said Roman as his little face lit up. "Okay." Daddy then assured Roman that I was not leaving to stay in the hospital like I did before - I would be home every night now. These two statements seemed to make him feel loads better. So tonight, gentle readers, you get a picture of both of my boys - a great closeup of Charlie without tubes or wires (they're just hidden!), and a picture of Roman from a couple days ago, dancing like a silly boy in our dining room.